I’ve made the following two statements my personal mantras:
Don’t speak out of anger.
Logic and emotion are like oil and water; they don’t mix.
Heck, I’ve preached these to anyone who would listen for as long as I can remember. While I’ve made some progress, I still have a ways to go.
For example, I happened to catch one of our children’s classes improperly-staffed one day and didn’t bother to ask why. Instead, I gave the instructor a piece of my mind. And, of course, the self-justification for being angry set in.
“This should be addressed immediately. The safety of the kids is at stake,” I thought. I then told myself (but not really believing it), “I’m calm. Honestly, I just need to get this off of my chest before I explode.”
So there I flew, tying into a couple of hard-working, conscientious instructors who happened to be doing their best. They apologized. It shouldn’t have happened. They said they’d make sure it wouldn’t happen in the future, etc. I felt a sense of power as I strutted off. I sure showed them who was boss!
As is so often the case, I quickly found out the real story. One of the scheduled instructors had had a legitimate emergency and couldn’t come to work. To solve this problem, the instructor solicited the help of another staff member who hadn’t been scheduled to teach that class. There is a portion of each class during which the instructor divides the students into smaller groups to practice specific things. What I had seen was the only chunk of class that wasn’t fully staffed. They had done the best they could with the resources they had. I had some apologizing to do.
Next time, I will behave differently. I will hold my temper (at least I hope I will). Whenever I become emotional and speak out of anger, I end up regretting it. Next time I will try to remember:
Don’t speak out of anger.
Logic and emotion are like oil and water; they don’t mix.
Would you like more tips like this one to pass along to your instructors? Check out our free e-book, 12 Don’ts of a Martial Arts Instructor.
